I can’t stop remembering the memories. They won’t stop.
I just completely rambled to Aimee and Corinna, two girls from expo, over Skype. I just let go and said how I felt. Then I had to ask for forgiveness, as part of me hadn’t even realised I was doing it.
The pain just wont go away.
Am I meant to be this way? Did I do something in a past life which I now need to repent for? Why won’t the hurt just leave me alone?
Yet, try as I may, I just can’t imagine happiness. Because I no longer know what would make me happy again.
Possibly a boyfriend. Possibly money. But then again, maybe not.
I told myself by day 100 I’d probably be fine and dandy. Yet right now, I feel no where near. I feel trapped and truly unhappy. How on earth do I lift myself out of this? It seems never ending….
March 10, 2010 at 9:51 pm |
You need to write down all the memories, seal them up in a box, tell your self you will never open it.
Don’t open it.
And don’t think about the stuff you did.
Now think about your future.
I presume your a healthy young girl with friends around you who care. You’re not starving. You’re not dieing. If this is the worst thing that will ever happen to you then you should count yourself lucky.
Just be happy the memories exist somewhere, outside of you.(i.e-the box)
good luck,get over it
March 10, 2010 at 9:53 pm |
That’s a really lovely idea, thank you, I appreciate that!